Why Asking for Help is a Skill Worth Developing—and Why I'm Learning to Ask Too
Growing up, I developed a real blockage around asking for help. I often heard things like, "It's too hard," "We don't have the time," or "It’s too expensive." This blockage and lack of support left a shadow over me and even as an adult, asking for support for MYSELF has seemed impossible and has challenged my mindset , leading me to believe that asking for myself was a burden and of no point. So, over time, I stopped asking altogether…for myself.
Interestingly, I’ve never had trouble asking for others.
In fact, I’ve often found myself as the “conduit”—the person who connects others to the opportunities or support they need. Maybe that’s why I’ve been told I’d make a great ventriloquist! But when it comes to advocating for myself, that’s where I need to be more confident, that I have what others need and I am not doing anyone a favour by “hiding under a bushel”.
And here’s why I’m writing this: because I want to get better at asking. I’ve dedicated years to building connections and communities for others through Your Time Matters, and curating events that create meaningful conversations and lasting connections.
While I’ll always be grateful for my role as founder and an event organizer for my community, and continue to foster the community and the knowledge and support it offers, I have more to contribute. So, let me introduce myself, I am Kerryn Powell, The Network Catalyst, and I use my skills to guide, mentor, and facilitate problem solvers , changemakers and those who may be networking apprehensive, to see that having the right connections, conversations and confidence will help you to make an impact and feel complete.
Why Asking Matters—And How It Changes Lives
Opportunities don’t just fall into our laps; we have to create them. Unfortunately, many people, like me, avoid asking for fear of rejection or the feeling that they’re being demanding. But the truth is, people aren’t mind readers. If we don’t ask, nothing changes.
Every successful person has faced rejection at some point, but the difference is—they didn’t stop asking.
Take, for example, Sara Shams, a person who inspires me daily. Sara is a bilateral above knee amputee, disability advocate, speaker, model, and health care professional. The lack of visible representation of people with disabilities in the nineties impacted how Sara perceived herself and identified with her disability. Sara’s journey to embracing her quirks was facilitated by an adaptive mindset and a conscious decision to work on identifying, challenging, and externalising her critical inner voice.
Sara dreamed of running the 5km Bridge to Brisbane event. She applied for a grant from the Start Foundation, who we supported for many years as they provided grants for amputees with a sporting dream. Her first application wasn’t successful. But instead of giving up, she applied again the next year and succeeded. That grant for her running blades was a nug stepping stone. It boosted her confidence and helped her achieve her goal, and for us, and it allowed us to help and support her.
Sara is definitely worth following on Instagram for her inspirational posts and authentic stories of her life’s journey , and you might also like to listen to my podcast, where Sara shared that we need to “Embrace your quirks” .
What did I learn when I reflect on Sara’s story and how we came to be connected? She asked for help, and that one question opened doors she never imagined. It’s a powerful reminder that asking can be the key to unlocking our potential and shaping our futures.
Why I’m Learning to Ask
Like many, I’m working on shifting my mindset. I want to contribute my knowledge and experience to support others, to guide them in unlocking their own potential. And in order to do that, I need to let you know more about me and my plans moving forward.
For years, I’ve been seen as the event organizer of Your Time Matters, and while that’s a role I cherish, I’m asking for your help now as I step forward and really own my space as The Network Catalyst. Did you know that I am also able to speak, mentor, and support individuals and groups with my expertise? I’m here guide and equip others to leverage the power of networking to unearth the pathways they need for success. Networking is transformational when done correctly. To do this, and to contribute to community and unlock potential, I need your help in connecting me with those who would benefit from what I have to offer.
How We Can All Get Better at Asking
In preparation for this “ask” , I asked myself a critical question: “What do I need to do differently to feel more comfortable asking for myself?”
Here’s what I discovered:
Shift Your Mindset: Asking for help is an opportunity, not a burden. When you ask, you’re offering someone the chance to help you, and if they say no, you’re no worse off than before.
Be Clear and Specific: Don’t waffle—make sure you’ve thought through your request. Show that it’s something you’ve put time and effort into.
Start Small and Build Up: Asking for small favors helps you build the habit, so you feel more comfortable making bigger requests when it really matters.
I am very well aware that through conversations and connections (like you) new opportunities can appear, they can open doors, and create lasting change.
The answer is always no if you don’t ask, and that’s a reminder we all need from time to time.
Here’s My Ask:
You are a conduit to others. If you are speaking to a business owner or a changemaker in your network who has a vision, but is
feeling isolated and uncertain how to move forward,
lacks the confidence and courage to share their knowledge
or, is apprehensive about networking,
suggest they reach out to me. We can have a conversation and explore how I can elevate their vision and grow.
Tell them, my want lies in helping them boost their confidence, deepen their connections, and strengthen their networks so they can ask for what they need and turn their vision into reality. Together, we can create conversations that count and connections that lead to lasting success.
So, here’s to asking—because sometimes, all it takes is one conversation to change everything.
Hello , I am Kerryn Powell, The Network Catalyst and founder of Your Time Matters
I can support you and help you avoid mistakes in building your business and achieving your why, support you to stay on track, and achieve success more quickly and efficiently, by keeping you accountable and moving forward, reach out to me .
If you are interested in a business community, check out mine- Your Time Matters.